The Pen in Hand Blog featuring Bill Stokes
Attribution: Trailer screenshot, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons; https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Marlon_Brando_in_%27Streetcar_named_Desire%27_trailer_(cropped).jpg
Category:Humor
Kickass and Christmas Croc
Attribution: Photo by Alvin David on Unsplash By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper asking the public if it has heard about the 11-foot crocodile captured in South Patrick Shores, Florida with a Golden Retriever clamped in its jaws? The purpose of bringing up such an unpleasant image follows in the mode of the diversionary …
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Kickass and Press Briefing
Attribution: The White House, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper hearing about the search for a Journalist willing to attend a White House briefing and ask the POTUS “Donald, what the f… is wrong with you?” The thinking is that such a question would mark the end …
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Kickass and New Second Amendment
By Bill Stokes Illustration by Michael DiMilo Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper promoting some revision of the 2ndamendment as follows: “The right to BARE arms means you can wear t-shirts and has nothing to do with guns. The fact of more guns than people in this country is due to a Constitutional spelling …
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Kickass and Inoculation Mishap
By Bill Stokes Attribution: James Gillray, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons Kickass, the doorstop dog, joins the keeper in acknowledging the news that a Fox Lake herd of dairy cows has been infected with the bird flu; and this of course prompts the keeper to tell Phyllis—probably not for the first time, about his inoculation …
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Kickass and Deer-Yard Night
Attribution: Photo by Nathan Karsgaard on Unsplash By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, notes the inevitability of the keeper using the first bitter cold winter day to regale Phyllis with the account of his spending the night in a Bad River deer yard when the temperature dropped to 30 below and he could not buckle his snowshoes …
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Kickass and Dog in the Manger
Attribution: Harrison Weir, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, noting the keeper and Phyllis’s confusion with some of the seasonal stories now circulating, some using a “manger” setting, suggest that “dog in the manger” is a more appropriate theme this year than baby Jesus “asleep in the hay.” Defined …
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Kickass and Santa Letter
Attribution: Photo by Y M on Unsplash By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper and Phyllis receiving the POTUS list of executive facts to help the kids compile this year’s Letter to Santa. 1. Santa’s address has been changed from North Pole to Mar-a-Lago. 2. Santa is still a fat man but he no longer has facial …
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Kickass and Depression Babies
Attribution: Dorothea Lange, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper and thousands of other “Depression babies” would likely not exist had there been an “affordability” consideration to their births. But since there is no immediate cost to the physical act of making babies, even with an …
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Kickass and Illegal Order
Attribution: Hillebrand Steve, U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper, after getting Phyllis’s approval, is seeking reactivation of his military status so he can see what happens when he refuses to obey an unlawful military order to help murder men in …
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Kickass and Broken Tail
Attribution: T. H. Heard (engraver), Heard, T. H. (engraver, active ca. 1879) (Engraver) Harper’s magazine, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper, ever anxious to share his vast store of rural knowledge with innocent citified friends, notes that growing up “country” means being surrounded by critters …
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Kickass and Calling Reporters Names
Attribution: DonkeyHotey, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper passing the word that when it comes to calling reporters derogatory names, the POTUS—with his “piggy” and “bad person” is a minor leaguer. As he thinks back over the years at some of the names he was called, …
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