Attribution: Illustration of Humpty Dumpty from Through the Looking Glass, by John Tenniel, 1871., Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports to the keeper with inside information that billionaire POTUS sycophants have purchased Ground Hog’s Day, Easter, Valentines Day, and April Fools Day to fabricated a combined holiday gift for their narcissistic messiah savior that will be symbolized by the rotund figure of a thousand-pound gorilla coming down out of the trees, throwing multicolored rotten eggs at the broken hearts of the populace and claiming that there will soon be lots of money in all the doggie-doo bags and there will be no tariffs on used kitty litter.
The holiday heroic figure’s name will be Humpty Dump and if he does not take a great fall very soon there will be three more years of really rotten political bull…
The new holiday will go on the calendar as either “National Dump Day” or “Jeffrey Epstein Memorial Day” to honor Hunpty Dump’s great friend and mentor.
Happy Dump Day and may you see your shadow skipping ahead of you toward a fresh burrow!!
