Attribution: David Mican, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, notes that the keeper spends a lot of time at the Madison VA eye clinic receiving expert treatment and monitoring that has kept him in the vision game for decades.
As a gesture of appreciation, the keeper reports on a recent conversation he had with a young ophthalmologist-in-training named Lucas.
Keeper: “As you describe various functions of the eye, Lucas, how would you define ogling?”
Lucas: “I’m not very good at definitions.”
Keeper: “Well, there are eye functions like staring and glaring and gazing that are easily understood but ogling not so much.”
Lucas: “It hasn’t been covered in any of my classes yet.”
Keeper: “The dictionary says ogling is looking at something with greedy or interested attention, which I have done a lot of.”
Lucas: “Can we talk about your next appointment?”
Keeper: “I have ogled cars and expensive flyrods and lots of other items, including Phyllis, of course…”
Lucas: “Excuse me while I get the doctor’s approval on this report so we can get you out of here and on your way.”
Photo by Bill Stokes