Walmart Corporate from Bentonville, USA, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper, operating under the arrangement that everyone is now an unpaid employee of Walmart, took it upon himself to seek out a uniformed supervisor to suggest that a befuddled elderly couple that he had been …
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Category:Humor
Kickass and Out-of-State Governor
Elkanah Tisdale (1771-1835) (often falsely attributed to Gilbert Stuart)[1], Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper’s ability to remain vigilant during trying times, has revealed to him the Tim Michael’s gubernatorial plan for deporting Madison liberals to Florida in exchange for demented Ron DeSantis followers who …
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Kickass and Weight Guessing
Corey Coyle, CC BY 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper was pawing through a box of yellowed clips from fifty or so years ago, and ran across one in which he–the keeper joined Bob Cleven at the 1974 Janesville 4-H fair at Bob’s “guess your weight or age” …
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Kickass and Dogs in Heaven
Petful from New York City, USA, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons http://www.petful.com By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper’s acceptance that there are those among us who speak of departed dogs waiting for them in heaven, but he is not sure that explains the following message which was recently delivered to him …
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Kickass and Pillow Talk
Gage Skidmore from Surprise, AZ, United States of America, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports an occasion of pillow talk involving the keeper and his pillow, Phyllis being engrossed in reading a novel: Pillow: “I’m being requited by Mike Lindell.” Keeper: “To do what?” Pillow: “To promote the …
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Kickass and Hat Knocked Off
Photo by Bill Stokes By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, cannot help but be impressed by the fact that, even at his advanced age, the keeper has learned something as basic as how to get into his car without knocking his hat off. It is as absurd as it sounds, but several weeks ago the …
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Kickass and Balcony Chickens
Free range chickens at Horsegills Farm by Oliver Dixon, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper, while trying to keep up to speed with the Queen’s coffin and the DOJ’s juggling of secret documents, volunteers the following poster from someone else’s post to further his—the keeper’s campaign …
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Kickass and Four Year Old Post
Photo by Bill Stokes By Bill Stokes (Given his very senior status, the keeper–without apology, is repeating a post from four years ago.) Kickass, the doorstop dog, has passed on to the keeper the unlimited skills that dogs have for relaxing and taking the day off. There needs to be no good reason for this, …
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Kickass and 9/11/22
Photo by Richard Burlton on Unsplash By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, joins the keeper in acknowledging the anniversary of the current cellular arrangement by which he–the keeper has marched in the evolutionary parade for an insignificant split second of time on an infinitesimal speck of planetary dirt and dust. Given just barely enough …
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Kickass and Birthday Rejection
Sophie Riches, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, will be napping through the keeper’s lament on the eve of yet another birthday in which he observes that one day you are sung and secure in your mother’s womb and the next day you are ejected in what might well …
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Kickass and Queen’s Procession
Queen Elizabeth II by Oast House Archive, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper joins the crowd in pulling out the remotest Queen-related incident to join in marking her passing: it was at a Caribbean vacation location sometime in the 1980’s, when Queen Elizabeth’s visit coincided with …
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Kickass and Presidential Portraits
United States Department of Justice, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons By Bill Stokes Kickass, the doorstop dog, acknowledges the keeper’s discovery that the reason the Obama official portraits were only recently unveiled at the White House is that they have just been found by DOJ among all the secret stuff strewn around Mar-a-lago. Just why …
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