Attribution: Photo by Mitesh on Unsplash
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, noting that the keeper is never at a loss for things to complain about, hereby offers his annual condemnation of lawns—those boring monocultures of an exotic plant that we groom like surgical-room carpeting, pouring on poison to eliminate native plant growth and killing all insects, including the pollinating bees.
In an absurd outgrowth of mimicking early English royalty, US homeowners surround their dwellings—castles, with unnatural green carpets and then they spend unlimited energy and loads of money to keep so much as one dandelion or one bee from besmirching the flawless green exhibit.
As an official “Master Gardener” specializing in wildflowers, Phyllis agrees with the keeper on the green-grass-only lawn issue.
The two of them, on their “windshield” surveys, often pass judgement on the residents of the lawn castles; “If their lives are as boring as their front yards they are to be pitied.”
The keeper has family in the lawn and tree business—Becky at “Busy B’s Landscape Care” and Beau and others at “Andrews Tree Service.”
Give them or someone like them a call or stop mowing the boring green lawn and see what interesting things happen.
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