Attribution: Michael Coghlan from Adelaide, Australia, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons
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By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, bypasses the keeper and Phyllis in offering his own canine explanation of just how the orange poodle’s tariff system works:
“First, consider the world to be a big tree which all of the male dogs have been using to mark their territory.
“This tariff tree served all of the male dogs well for decades, and if a dog took his tariff tree territorial claim too seriously the other dogs put him in his place by chasing him out of the park.
“Then, along came the orange poodle whose keeper brought a chainsaw and sawed down the tariff tree. But he was unskilled and the tree fell on him and the orange poodle, pinning them to the ground which meant that all the dogs, even the females had no choice except to mark territory on them as they squirmed in an agony of narcissism which they claimed to be shivers of delight and joy.
“Kickass hopes he has been helpful and will now go back to preparing for his filibuster howl with Cory Booker.”
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