Attribution: Jon Sullivan, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports the keeper finding the following note in the chimney ashes:
“Dear Bill and Phyllis: As you already know I will not be coming down your chimney this year as I have put my name on the transfer portal and will be distributing gifts only for billionaires under the Fat-Cat company label.
“This decision was not mine alone but became necessary after reindeer stable boy Musk refused to replace Rudolph’s nose batteries.
“As for the gifts on your Christmas list, I would not have been able to wrap up Canada for Phyllis, even given it is her birthplace as the country is being delivered to a Christmas address in Florida. Greenland and Panama would also have been impossible for the same reason.
“And in reference to Bill’s request to fill his stocking with artificial intelligence, this was identified as delivery already having been made and he is required to log in to “Lump of Coal” and follow the 78 prompts.
“It was nice doing business with you over the years, and I always appreciated the brandy you left out to help wash down the cookies.
“Good luck and Merry Christmas!
“Santa”
Comments