Attribution: Wtshymanski, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper suffered yet another attack by a stray pound that used ambush tactics in the night to join the other invader pounds in their waistline stronghold. Following a dining night out by the keeper and Phyllis, there was the invader pound on the bathroom scale the next morning like a coiled cobra.
The fact that stray-pound ambushes are incredibly common across the aging population is of little comfort to the keeper, and he is moved to seek government assistance in defending against them, maybe give the EPA authority to ban garlic gravy and chocolate cake.
Some years ago, the keeper sought to have his invader waistline pounds identified as a pregnancy, but that did not end well after there was an obvious equipment failure!
Help is available to those who keep dogs to assist them in protecting against attacking pounds: a begging dog can be a great help in limiting the human intake of most anything that encourages pounds to attack.
Then there is cast-iron Kickass who doesn’t eat anything, except for his own words on occasion.
So the keeper is on his own, handicapped by a dearth of willpower and Phyllis’s outstanding cooking talent.Â
Photo by Bill Stokes