Artwork by Michael DiMilo
By Devotee-DeBusherre
Featuring the Fabulous Dadbots: Dave S., Mark M., Mark O., Dennis C., Paul C., and Geoff Carter
This got wordy, I’ll try and distill it first. Though I don’t like the term for the campaign—bullying—(I think many scoff at it saying…”Well (male, gravel pitched, voice),…it’s a tough world out there…don’t be a wuss…you can’t try and raise the world’s kids in a rubber room). So whatever…re the word,, the essence being intimidating behavior. Which can get out of control, so quickly. Hopefully we’ve only experienced a 4 year hiatus in the march to stamp it out or at least to raise consciousness—gotta start somewhere and the schools are the perfect place. Hopefully it garners bi-partisan support, does not get squelched by those marauding Mequon moms that have no patience for critical race theory and want their kids—or maybe the weak kids—the one’s just learning English…to “just suck it up”. Said hiatus due to trump, (but some say this started with the negativism of Newt Gingrich, furthered by Pat Buchanan, (reeled in by Bob Dole), trump was just the first to get through Republican Party gatekeepers, due to John McCain passing away and others being caught by surprise—I’ve read.
Well, the year was 2015—1 year before the orange broke through. Flying back from Iceland family vaca sitting next to a little old lady. She’s personable, intelligent and confides in me the loss of her adult son, just a couple weeks prior. Her son was married to Sharon Sandberg, Facebook COO (I think she recently stepped down). They must’ve been a Si Valley power-couple as he had several successful ventures (Aps….survey thing…he invented and sold). Bizarre death—fell on a treadmill at a resort in Mexico, (be careful how you fall, don’t hit your head!). Well his mom is no slouch herself, heads up a non-profit in MSP focused on disadvantaged kids, preventing bullying, and doing other good deeds. I later made a donation and get their newsletters. She was not in the selling mode, just passing time on the flight home.
https://www.pacer.org/bullying/
This leads me to bullying and “pc-ness”….the stigma of “woke”… what I call “anti-pc’-ing”…anti-gay, anti-abortion, anti-trans, anti- #MeToo, anti-bicycling on country roads (rolling coal pick-up trucks) anti California (…noth’en but fruits and nuts out there….’) Those mentalities that every society slowly evolves out of. More slowly if run by a tyrant. Decades…centuries… Yeesh, depressing but there is only so much change we can force down other culture’s throats. The Brits tried this…but so did many others (Spain, Portugal, France, The Vikings…but drifting, way out of my league here). In our country, thankfully it is a democracy so, even if there are big differences—say gay marriage—eventually thought, discussion, science, generations pass and change happens.
So the anti-one I wanted to focus on was bullying. I had the feeling, back in 2015 that bullying awareness was everywhere. And what a great step for a modern society to take. Finally addressing it early, and in schools, on the playground. Nip it in the bud. I was so happy to see the trend. Met said lady who was addressing it, not only on the playground but on the internet, and OMGosh…seemed like it was a burgeoning trend/consciousness.
Then came trump. F! He single handedly restored bully behavior as not just acceptable, but laudable. Via “little” Marco Rubio, “weak”: Jeb Bush, the “failing NY Times”, attacking the non-Caucasian veteran in the wheelchair at one of his speeches(!?!), attacking reporters in the White House briefing room…the misogyny caught on tape, the list goes on and on. Single handedly he not only stalled our US movement, but gave legitimacy to fringe groups all over the world. Shocking, (to me), how extensively the US shapes world events. I guess it takes someone to be out front—California is that to the rest of the US in many (good) ways. Trump was that in being pro bullying, macho and intimidating like various hard right leads in Europe (LaPen in France, Turkey’s turkey PM, Italy’s just elected PM, many others, and of course validating Putin). At times I lapse into some real pro-national pride when I see just how bad most of the rest of the world is. But that quickly passes when I realize everything is relative and we still have tons of Neanderthals lurking above and below the surface. Heck, many in the WOW counties, Paper Valley, etc. …. here in Wisco. I also question self, saying: Bad/shocking news happens all the time on the world level…did the Gingrich-Buchanan-trump movement give wings to this rogue German government overthrow group recently? Dunno, but IMO, there has been enough of this emboldening to not overstate the harm he/it has caused. On the half full side: That’s how change occurs it lurches forward and back, but eventually moves forward—as long as free thought/lack of tyranny prevails.
Which brings me to the Daniel Snyder story. The macho NFL being a bastion of the anti-movement. I read that the House had to quickly get this report done, before the R majority took over the house and nixed it. And I saw it as glass full, a return to the trend of stamping out this macho/bullying, old guys making cheerleaders pose with their shirts off…buying prostitutes at retreats in Colorado…etc. …then intimidating witnesses with more of the same macho, intimidating warfare.
Hopefully the trump era will die and we’ll return to the rigor of free thought running its course. Even if it evolves to DeSantis my hope is the debate returns to civil disagreement not bullying. It may be met with resistance, (you’d think not), will take time, but at least free speech will occur. With trump—and this has been said by many others to the point where it sounds overblown, his bully behavior was, (and still is), a Hitler-esque threat. Gerrymandering and the election control gatekeeper manipulation, (obscure city/town/village appointees), is a snake in the grass which the NY Times, Joe and others have been vigilant to ID as a threat to democracy. I hate to use trite Star Wars cliché’s—I really do….makes me feel like a puppet, yet the Yoda line: “difficult to see the dark side”….rings so true. No one saw the mentality to buy into Trump’s negativism coming. Many of us are still shocked there are 73M that voted for him. Ironic it was the left that was so rudely awakened, (woke), that fateful day in November 2016.
-D.
There was a prominent faction of bullies with high social standing, good athletes all, at my Catholic grade school. This group of guys just ruled the social peer group roost. I never thought of it as bullying — never used the word — but that’s what it was. That clique of tough guys made me keep my head down. And I kept my head down when they picked on other kids, just happy to not be their target. It’s a big part of why I was so happy to move out of that school and into 9th grade at the high school. I just wanted to leave that behind.
I agree, it really did seem as if bullying had been well and truly identified as a problem for school age children, and that “bipartisan” forces were being brought to bear on the issue. “Bipartisan”, because both liberals and conservatives could agree that bullying behavior is a negative.
Then, as you point out, America took a huge step backward by promoting this insane and shameless narcissist to the Presidency. And he touches a nerve for millions of people. Trump’s constant display of bullying behavior does create a permission structure for both kids and adults to bring out their inner bully.
Mark M.
What a trip, Dave, literally. Iceland! Cool pics. Fam is lookin’ good. And sitting next to Sharon Sandberg’s anti-bullying mother-in-law on the plane? Wow. I actually remember reading the strange, sad story of her son’s death…
Okay. Looks like the main topic of this thread is about bullying, so I shall stay on topic as promised:
I’m taking a glass half full viewpoint about bullying; I think anti-bullying campaigns have been pretty successful and that, despite Trump-ism, there’s less bullying among young people these days than there was when we were kids.
As a middle-school teacher in Cudahy for five years I was often pleasantly surprised by the kindness and patience many kids showed toward those who had learning disabilities. For example, during one of my Language Arts classes, a 7th grade boy was disrupting my brilliant lecture about proper nouns. After a couple of gentle reminders to quiet down, I broke into what the kids called my “loud scary voice” to “redirect him to his task” (as teachers say). One of the more popular girls in class waved me over and whispered to me that “Caleb has ADHD. He can’t help acting like that sometimes. He just needs to move around a little.” Properly schooled by a seventh-grade girl, I had Caleb hand out worksheets, which settled him down a bit.
Anti-bullying efforts seem to have empowered kids to point out what they see as bullying behavior, even, for better or worse, in teachers. Among their peers, bullies no longer seem all that cool or popular; they no longer hold court on the playground like they did back when we were kids.
As Mark M points out, bullies were a fact of life for kids back in the day. It was like “Lord of the Flies” out there. In my neighborhood, we carefully avoided crossing paths with “big kids”. We especially feared and avoided “Butchie”, a giant of a kid rumored to have flunked third grade twice. With his moronic friends, Butchie once held down another neighbor kid and pee’d all over him. Parents were informed, but they kind of shrugged off the incident; back then dealing with bullies was considered a part of growing up — like getting impaled with a “Jart”, or running behind the truck spraying DDT smoke.
Any sort of progress seems to involve the dance of two steps forward, one back, but I’ve seen how well anti-bullying efforts are bearing fruit among young people. Slowly but surely anti-bullying efforts will continue to make forward progress despite the backwards steps fostered by crusty old bullies like Trump and Daniel Snyder.
DC