Flying Logos, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, reports that the keeper is late today because he was delayed at a meeting with his banker in which he–the keeper was attempting to borrow enough money to bid in the Wisconsin auction coming up Nov. 8 in which the current top bidder has a $17 million mansion in Connecticut and wants to buy Wisconsin to play with as an out-of-state ego yoyo.
The banker, of course, laughed the keeper off the premises, and told him that anyone living in a state where the minority-rep legislature gets away with preventing the citizens from even voting on an issue like abortion, that person is not a good risk for surviving long enough to repay a loan.
The banker further said that so long as Tony Evers has his finger in the political dike to prevent an immoral tsunami, the keeper and his ilk can continue to dogpaddle in the gerrymandered, Repub-tainted Wisconsin water.
As to how he might get enough money to participate in the Nov. 8 Wisconsin auction, the banker suggested that the keeper contact Ron Johnson who believes in the orange tooth fairy, is also a rich SOB, and is also listed on the Nov. 8 Wisconsin Auction bill.
(An effort to replace the word “election” with “auction” in official documents is pending before a committee chaired by Snoopy, who says cheesy Wisconsin has not only lost its moral compass but is also beginning to smell like aged-brick, and even limburger.)
