Photo by Alex Martinez on Unsplash
Kickass, the doorstop dog, joins the keeper as he shouts, “MAYDAY! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!” as loudly as possible in the hope that he will be rescued from his slovenly way of life and made productive again, perhaps in the mode of those reporters at the WH correspondents’ dinner last night who were told by the POTUS that they were never more essential to the preservation of democracy.
Should the keeper’s “Mayday” plea be answered, he would take his renewed PRESS credentials to Florida and interview kids about the DeSantis recess from truth and reality, and then to Kentucky to ask women how they feel about being forced to bear rapists’ babies, and then to Washington to investigate what loco weed is in the Republican diet that causes them such severe mental constipation that they cannot pass anything but gas.
Should the keeper’s renewed credentials qualify him as a foreign correspondent, he would try to get to Moscow and ask Putin if he considers himself human or if he thinks he might have recycled into a cellular glob of narcissistic, unconscionable slime?
“Mayday” as a distress signal was adapted in the 1920’s and is from the French word “m’aidez” which means “help me,” so says Wikipedia.
M’AIDEZ! M’AIDEZ! M’AIDEZ!
