Fred Kissel, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, is working with the keeper in developing the “Compression helmet,” which will work like compression socks to improve cranial blood circulation, particularly in the brains of those Republicans who suffer from the varicose big lie.
Republican mandates to wear the compression helmets are anticipated across the country as the Repubs are told by their MAGA leader that the helmets cure ED.
The keeper expects the compression helmets to be widely marketed through Walmart where they will be offered in assorted colors and sizes and shapes, including cone-shape to recall the thought processes of earlier head-compression headgear wearers.
Democrats, in keeping with their liberal ways, will obviously be anxious to assist the Repubs in putting on their compression helmets, particularly in Wisconsin where Ron Johnson and Vos and others have been leading a move to completely inhibit blood circulation to all state brains. (Wool-lined compression helmets will be available in Wisconsin until April 1 or until the snow melts.)
