Stupid is as Stupid Does

Artwork by Michael DiMilo

By Geoff Carter

Last week, State Representative Jonathon Carroll introduced a bill in the Illinois State Legislature that would require residents who have refused the Covid-19 vaccination—and who subsequently contract the virus—to cover the expenses of treating the disease on their own, even if they have health insurance. Rep. Carroll has argued that the bill would encourage residents to get vaccinated and would also, as a result, cut down on Covid infection rates in the state. He cites insurance companies charging higher premiums for smoking and other risky behaviors as a precedent.

While many will argue that this sort of law would be cruel and discriminatory, there is a certain logic to it. Like the insurance companies that charge scuba divers, skydivers, and rock-climbers higher premiums because of risky behaviors, people who choose to be at risk by not getting vaccinated should also be held responsible for their actions; after all, they not only drive up insurance premiums but also clog up hospital intensive care units and stretch the limits our health care personnel to the breaking point.

Their refusal of anti-vaxxers to acknowledge the efficacy of the vaccine is, by any coherent scientific standard, indefensible. It is not—as they claim—dangerous, nor has there been any proof offered that the vaccine itself is part of a dark plot to subjugate humanity. It has been tested extensively and have proven safe and effective at preventing Covid 19. It has been approved by the FDA and the CDC. Only very rarely have patients shown ill side effects from the vaccines (which have been immediately addressed by those agencies). 

Yet a small segment of the population refuses to listen to reason. It’s not logical, but if the non-vaxxers choose to reject science and not seem completely hypocritical (if that matters to them), perhaps they should follow that type of thinking (such as it is) to its logical conclusion. 

For instance, if they don’t trust the medical science that engineered the vaccine, then they shouldn’t trust physicians at all, right? So then why are they still seeing family doctors and clogging up our emergency rooms when they get Covid? 

If they don’t trust the testing protocols that gave the go-ahead to the vaccines, then they shouldn’t trust any over the counter or prescription drugs that went through the same rigorous procedures. Right? No more aspirin, Tylenol, or Imodium for you.

And, as an addendum to this, if they refuse to trust the Covid vaccine, why should they trust the polio, smallpox, or other childhood vaccinations we all underwent as children? (Some, in fact, do refuse to vaccinate their children—with sometimes tragic results) but all have lived through the vaccination process.

If they don’t believe in scientific research or the stringent methodology that brought us the techniques and protocols necessary to manufacture the Covid vaccines, then, by extension, they shouldn’t believe in—or use—any of the technology that came about because of that sort of scientific thinking. For instance: 

Science brought about understandings of radio waves, microwaves, and electricity. It clarified the mechanics of flight. Using this knowledge, scientists have launched numerous communication satellites, and so (according to the anti-vaxxers rejection of scientific thought), the satellites orbiting the Earth (the round Earth) and that have given us WiFi, television, and telecommunication abilities should not be trusted. 

All right, anti-vaxxers. Turn in your phones, unplug your TVs, and disconnect your computer (which you won’t use anyway because it’s another product of technological research) from the internet. 

But wait a minute. Without the Internet, the anti-vaxxers never would have heard about these idiotic and irresponsible conspiracy theories bashing vaccines in the first place. They never would have been exposed to these theories in the first place. Would that have changed anything? I suspect not. Idiocy will find a way.

So, to sum up, if they anti-vaxxers reject the science behind the analytical virology, endocrinology, and the production of the vaccine, and even Dr. Fauci (talk about killing the messenger) then, by logical extension, they should also reject all other devices and conveniences brought to us as products of scientific endeavor. 

So. No more TikTok, Zoom, video games, CGI (or DVDs and movies), high-powered rifles, semi-automatic weapons, jet skis, or ATVs.  No more OTC medicine, doctor visits, iPhones, internet, computers, radio, television, smart cars, cruise ships, pick-up trucks, bullet trains, or passenger jets. 

If the anti-vaxxers followed their thinking (such as it is) to its logical conclusion, they would probably end up living in caves with (maybe) a fire, wearing skins from animals they’d clubbed to death. They might have figured out the wheel (if they haven’t rejected it because it’s obviously a plot conceived by Bill Gates to control the collective American mind) but probably little else.

Responsible skepticism is healthy, but blanket skepticism born of fear and ideological zealotry is stupid—and dangerous. 

Yes, there are risks—minimal risks—to being vaccinated, but the shots do not contain nanobots or mind-control drugs or LSD. If you’re worried about the risks, talk to your trained health care provider. Don’t listen to some idiotic ying-yang on the internet spouting off some conspiracy theory nonsense. Trust the science. Use the science. After all, you already use it every day. Ask for solid verifiable proof. Ask for verification–but ask the right people.

Science has brought us a long way. Without it, we would all still be living in caves. To reject the science out of hand is to reject our very culture and civilization. To reject science is to reject the technology we use every day. If you want to do that, fine. Knock yourselves out. But don’t put the rest of us at risk, too. To do so would be nothing short of selfish, negligent, and stupid. And criminal. 

But, stupid is as stupid does.