MoveON moving, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons
By Bill Stokes
Kickass, the doorstop dog, is rarely challenged by over-work, but it has been happening the past several days as the keeper and Phyllis engaged a small army of professionals to move them and their clutter to a new West Madison location. Never has Kickass been put to such a doorstop test!Â
The keeper claims he has also been under great stress simply because his eat/sleep cycle was upended; but much more than half the clutter was due to his pack-rat mentality, a fact that Phyllis charitably ignores—most of the time.
There are, of course, creatures among us that move to new locations with a natural alacrity that begs the question of why humans did not share a few of those easy-moving genes? Turtles and migrating birds come to mind.
So now the keeper and Phyllis try to function amid what might be compared to a rat’s-nest, indicating that they might, after all, share some genes with another species, albeit a rat.
However, considering Phyllis’s expansive capacity for organization, the rat’s-nest disorder is only temporary, and the slovenly keeper will shortly find himself living in a degree of neatness not known to him since Saturday morning Army inspections about a hundred years ago.
George Carlin long ago recognized the absurdity of how humans cripple their lives with excessive stuff—George had another name for stuff, and the keeper wishes George was still around to issue new advice; perhaps putting a limit on humans moving with more than they can carry in their pockets.
Phyllis would appreciate that.
